Picture your child walking alongside you at Newport on the Levee for a fun-filled afternoon. They spot an older man struggling with groceries and, without hesitation, offers to help. A smile spreads across his face as your kid says, “I’II be back in a minute, Mom,” and carries the bags to the man’s car. This, right here, is the essence of chivalry in action. We’ve got 5 ways to inspire chivalry in your child.
Chivalry isn’t just about damsels in distress and shining armor. It’s about respect, kindness, helpfulness and integrity — qualities that make one a positive force in the world. Here’s how to teach your son — or daughter — chivalry, so they grow into courteous, respectful adults.
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Set the Example
Kids are like sponges, soaking up everything you do and say. In the classic case of a monkey doing what a monkey sees, a recent study found that positive parental behaviors inspire prosocial on-field actions of youth athletes.
So, teach your children chivalrous social skills by embodying them yourself in your daily actions. Be courteous to everyone you interact with, hold doors open and offer your seat on the crowded TARC bus to someone in need. When you practice these behaviors, your child sees them as normal and will probably do the same in their interactions with people. Even small acts, like a friendly smile, set a powerful example.
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Promote Polite Manners
Good manners are the basis of chivalry. They lay the groundwork for respectful interactions. By practicing politeness, your child learns how to navigate social situations with grace and courtesy. It enables them to build meaningful relationships with friends, family and others. They also develop a reputation for being considerable and honorable.
Make it a point to teach your child about different cultures and traditions and encourage them to learn about and practice cultural humility. Also, make them understand that chivalry isn’t just about respecting women. It’s about treating everyone with dignity, regardless of age, gender, race or disability. Correct gently and consistently, focusing on respect rather than punishment.
Begin training your kids to be good-mannered as soon as they can understand. Children who learn social competence skills at a young age develop highly functioning relationships with peers and adults. At the playground, they master communicating, respecting boundaries, and resolving conflicts amicably. “Please,” “May I,” “Excuse me,” and “Thank you” become part of their everyday vocabulary.
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Nurture Empathy and Concern for Others
Encourage your child to consider how their deeds impact others and always respect how others feel. Tell them it’s okay to check up on a peer they see crying in school or on the playground. Discuss how showing kindness can make someone’s day a little brighter. Stories, role-playing and sharing real-life experiences are fantastic ways of building empathy in kids.
While you’re at it, advise your children to use their words wisely. Explain how negative comments can hurt others and how positive language can uplift them. Teach them to think twice before speaking and choose words that build others up.
Also, reinforce the aspect of accountability. Teach young ones to own up to their mistakes and to make amends when necessary. They should know that this is respectful behavior.
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Teach the Value of Helping
Give your child opportunities to make choices that reflect chivalrous behavior. When outdoors, ask them if they would like to hold the door for someone or offer their seat to an older adult. Letting them choose will help them reinforce the value of helping others. Just don’t take those small acts of kindness for granted. Point them out and express your pride to let them know you appreciate their effort.
Involve your children in community service activities so they know why giving back to the community matters. Volunteering to causes that align with their interests is a great way to put chivalry into action — whether it’s helping out at the Louisville Metro Animal Shelter or joining a cleanup crew at a local park.
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Explore Stories of Honor
Explore chivalry through books and fun activities. Head to the Louisville Free Public Library with young school-age kids for a chivalrous adventure. Opt for books about brave, exemplary characters, like the tales of King Arthur, Robin Hood or Joan of Arc. Read and discuss the stories so they understand how these heroes embody courage and helpfulness. Older children will enjoy a weekend trip to the Kentucky Renaissance Faire for a thrilling immersion into chivalry. It’s a great way to learn about gallant historical figures.
Also, tell your kids the importance of standing up for others and reiterating the value of defending against bullying. This will instill a sense of justice in children and encourage them to speak out against unfair treatment.
Build a Legacy of Respect
Raising a child with courteous values can positively shape their interactions and character. Incorporate these tips into your daily life and watch your young ones grow into adults who respect and value others. Remember, the key to teaching your son chivalry is consistent, everyday actions. Louisville’s rich community is the perfect setting to raise a polite and respectful child.
